ALL the world

So I know we need to go visit all the people of the world and inform them of God's Word but I have never actually done that in the sense of mission trips or anything. This summer, however, I am going to Romania with the women's choir Bel Canto to sing for 2 weeks. We are going to praise God through our singing and bring worship to the people of Romania. I'm really excited about this trip because like I said I've never been on a missions trip and I think this is going to be really good for me. I'm so excited to get to know these people, talk to them, worship with them, it's going to be amazing. We are going to attend their churches and listening to their services which is cool. We are even learning songs in Romanian so we can communicate better and so they can fully understand our message. I love people and I agree we should tell ALL of them because I hate the idea of anyone not knowing God's incredible Word and not being able to have a relationship with Him only because they have never heard of Him. I think the guy in Beginnings made a good point about going out to all the people, shunning the sauce, and holding on tight. But seriously he's right and we should go out and tell people and I'm so excited to get to do that this summer.

Racism

Listening to that lady tell her story of being a child survivor of the Holocaust was incredible! It was so sad to see what really happened from someone who experienced first hand but it was interesting to find out about all the things that occurred as well and how she felt then and now. It is a miracle in itself that she survived but how cool that 5 people made it to America and that they were on the first boat to ever come over here with survivors was very cool I thought. She was such a nice lady too and getting to talk to her afterwards was very cool. She hugged and I felt I could feel all the pain and things she's experienced I just wanted to cry when she hugged me but tell her how happy I was to meet her at the same time. I hate how hate others and treat others it just doesn't make sense to me. To judge people in that fashion based off color or beliefs is ridiculous. I don't think I've ever personally struggled with it but one of my best friends is Jewish and I know she's dealt with it, not as harshly as the Holocaust survivor, but still it hurts. I remember someone saying during one of the fires a couple years ago when ash was flying everywhere them saying oh look it's raining Jews and her being right there. The look on her face just stabbed me even though I didn't say the horrible comment I felt the pain she did in hearing a comment like that. She just held her head up high and looked at them, told them that was really rude and that they should be ashamed for saying something that rude and walked away, then of course there was my best friend Ashleigh who yelled at him, socked him in the arm, and told him he's a jerk but not that word. :) I was mad I yelled at him and told him how stupid I thought he was among other things. Overall I think racism and prejudice against people is a waste of time and energy.

Sexual Molestation

A subject I guess that lies close to my heart. I wouldn't call it a struggle because I don't struggle with the actions of committing it but the outcomes from it I struggle, for lack of a better word, with it. Women and men are human beings created by God. They are loved by Him, cherished by Him, and are His children who he sent His son to die for. God does not want anything horrible to happen to us but he does find away to turn those hard times around to teach us and to help us grow. He makes them into something good. I know that, yet I still struggle with the reality of it when it slaps me in the face from time to time. Talking about it is a great resource for me which I use often and tears are my comfort and relief but sometimes those aren't enough. I turn to God for he hears my cries and he knows my pain. I have yet to find someone I can really talk to about this and I don't feel comfortable speaking with a counselor so my search continues. I'm coming to find that reason my needs and comforts through this rough patch are not being found are due to the fact that I'm turning to Earthly things or people rather than my Father. He alone is the only one who can get me through this and he provides the people to hug me, the people to love me, and the people to tell me everything will be ok, we'll get through this. My mom did it, my grandma did it, now it's my turn. I'm scared, I'm hurt but the anger is almost nothing. I haven't been angry in a long time but the hurt is still there. I can't honestly say I've forgiven but I try. These feelings and thoughts have not occurred in some time but this past week regrettably brought them back and brought them back strong. My common wish and prayer is that it will just go away, just leave me alone but God knows I need to get through this not run from it like I much rather do but He is going to help me to lean on Him and carry me through this.

This is what I needed to talk about. I can't reflect on it more than that and I hope that's ok. I almost didn't do it but this is what God helped me write because otherwise I don't think I could have.

Alcohol

Alcohol is something I'm not a big fan of. I've never tried alcohol but I've seen it in action on my friends and family so I'm not totally unfamiliar with it.

My mom is one of those people on a hot day she may drink a beer and a glass of wine during dinner occasionally but she doesn't get drunk and she says she remembers being drunk once in college then never again. My real dad had some problems with alcohol so I don't remember seeing him drink but then again I was seven and my step-dad and major problems with it and he's been sober 21 years. I asked once if he would ever try drinking again and he said no and I said why not, he said because he doesn't know what might happen and he's not willing to go back to where he was. I totally respect him for that. I once made the comment that my dad was a recovered alcoholic and he corrected me by saying you never fully recover, there is always a struggle and mine is maintaining sobriety. My aunt and uncle on my dad's side, my dad's brother, sat me down and went through family history with me letting me know things that run in my family since my dad's not around to do it they did and my mom doesn't know. Alcohol is a problem in my family which is why my uncle doesn't drink. My family likes to drink though, maybe not getting drunk but it seems to be in my genes to favor it. My whole Spencer side likes to go to this pizza place, watch the Cowboys game, and drink beer it's just a fun family gathering. It helps that my other uncle works for Budweiser so pizza places give him free beer because he supplies it and he helps them out for free when their machines break. On my mom's side there isn't a problem with alcohol, at least none that I'm aware of. My grandpa however touched it his whole life, 76 years. When he died I decided I, like him, would do the same.

My mom told me by the time I was in college or 21 I would change my mind about alcohol and never trying it but I feel that I won't. I have no interest at all. My mom let me take sips of her wine or beer or whatever when I was younger and everything was disgusting. I honestly don't think that even if I wanted to drink I would because the taste, smell and everything just repulses me. I also am a big law person and have felt really guilty when I jaywalked once so I don't think I would ever drink before I turn 21. I made a promise to my best friend, since she turns 21 before I do, that if I decide to drink that she will be there because she doesn't trust anyone else to take care of me if I drink too much or anything. But I really don't feel like I'm going to drink and definitely not right now, not that I have anything against people who do drink.

Using my Strengths

1) How can these strengths work against you if you don't manage them?

As for empathy I care about people and their feelings but I can't let other people's feelings affect me. It's great to care about people and love them, support them but I don't need to take their troubles and make them my own. Sometimes when people tell me all their problems I feel like they become my problems because I start stressing out because of what's going on with them. I need to make sure I step back and make sure I worry about my feelings occasionally if that makes any sense. Strategic is good for planning and getting things done but sometimes I need to step out of my box and experience life without a calender and let things come as they may. It is always good to make others feel wanted and included but sometimes I don't include myself and worry about others making friends and I forget about myself. I can be shy and stand offish sometimes and I need to make sure I don't forget to include myself as well as others. I love to learn which is great and nothing wrong with it but I need to take a break and have fun sometimes and that applies to being an achiever too, I'm always striving towards something trying to get everything done in one day but I need to learn to take a step back, breath, and just enjoy life. I need to step my busy bee life aside sometimes.

2) How do you plan to build on these strengths during your first semester at APU?

Empathy, I want to get know people, build friendships, and love on people. I don't want to the relationships where you wave in the hall or ask how they are in passing but you actually stop to see how they are. I love to be there for people and help them but I sort of want friends that will do the same for me as well which is what I feeling is homesick about, those people I left at home but I want friends here like that. Me there for them and them for me.
Includer, I want to make sure no one feels left out, that no one hates being here because they don't feel like they have any friends, that would just kill me. I truly want everyone to have a friend here because us as a school, community, and siblings in Christ need to love one another and never leave anyone behind. Bush would be so proud.
Strategic, I want to improve this strength even more because I'm going to need it being a music major. I need to learn to plan my time for school but also to get out of my room and experience college for the people and the fun not just the scholastic qualities it has to offer.
Learner, As wonderful as it is to learn and trust me nothing would thrill me more then sitting in my room with my head in a book learning everything there is to learn about Italy or whatever, I want to learn about people and God. I want to learn all I can about what I can do for them and what God wants me to do. I want to learn everything I can classes wise as well but my goal is to learn everything God wants me to learn and then some.
Achiever, I really want my dad to be proud of me. I know that my mom is so proud about me being here and going to college like I wanted unlike my dad wanted, for me to go to a community college for awhile, instead of living my dream coming here. I want him to see me succeed and know that my being here was the right choice and it's where I'm suppose to be. As a achiever that's my goal. But not only do I want to do well and achieve all my goals and do well in my classes but I want to do well for me, for my benefit. I want to see myself succeed for me most of all as much as I love my parents I need this for me as much, if not more, as I do for them.

Hopefully that made sense if not I apologize but it made sense to me I guess.

Top Five strengths

Empathy

You can sense the emotions of those around you. You can feel what they are feeling as though their feelings are your own. Intuitively, you are able to see the world through their eyes and share their perspective. You do not necessarily agree with each person's perspective. You do not necessarily feel pity for each person's predicament-this would be sympathy, not Empathy. You do not necessarily condone the choices each person makes, but you do understand. This instinctive ability to understand is powerful. You hear the unvoiced questions. You anticipate the need. Where others grapple for words, you seem to find the right words and the right tone. You help people find the right phrases to express their feelings-to themselves as well as to others. You help them give voice to their emotional life. For all these reasons other people are drawn to you.

I think that does relate to me. I'm a very sensitive person so therefore I'm very sensitive to others' feelings. I'm really good with finishing peoples sentences when they are trying to say what they feel but can't find the right words.

Includer

(formerly Inclusiveness) "Stretch the circle wider." This is the philosophy around which you orient your life. You want to include people and make them feel part of the group. In direct contrast to those who are drawn only to exclusive groups, you actively avoid those groups that exclude others. You want to expand the group so that as many people as possible can benefit from its support. You hate the sight of someone on the outside looking in. You want to draw them in so that they can feel the warmth of the group. You are an instinctively accepting person. Regardless of race or sex or nationality or personality or faith, you cast few judgments. Judgments can hurt a person's feelings. Why do that if you don't have to? Your accepting nature does not necessarily rest on a belief that each of us is different and that one should respect these differences. Rather, it rests on your conviction that fundamentally we are all the same. We are all equally important. Thus, no one should be ignored. Each of us should be included. It is the least we all deserve.

I know what it's like to be left out and it is one of the worst feelings so I'm very conscientious of those around me and make sure no one feels that way. It's just my nature to go sit with the person that's sitting alone, it's what I'd want someone to do for me, it's just my nature. I don't like when people judge people and don't include them because of that judgment it's wrong. I think includer fits me.

Strategic

The Strategic theme enables you to sort through the clutter and find the best route. It is not a skill that can be taught. It is a distinct way of thinking, a special perspective on the world at large. This perspective allows you to see patterns where others simply see complexity. Mindful of these patterns, you play out alternative scenarios, always asking, "What if this happened? Okay, well what if this happened?" This recurring question helps you see around the next corner. There you can evaluate accurately the potential obstacles. Guided by where you see each path leading, you start to make selections. You discard the paths that lead nowhere. You discard the paths that lead straight into resistance. You discard the paths that lead into a fog of confusion. You cull and make selections until you arrive at the chosen path-your strategy. Armed with your strategy, you strike forward. This is your Strategic theme at work: "What if?" Select. Strike.

I always think about what I do before I act. I'm a very organized person I know where everything is, it all has a place and I guess I do that with my decision as well. It's a good thing though because it leads me to the right paths and think about what could be better. I'm not sure if my theme is the what if? though. I'm not a big what if person.

Learner

You love to learn. The subject matter that interests you most will be determined by your other themes and experiences, but whatever the subject, you will always be drawn to the process of learning. The process, more than the content or the result, is especially exciting for you. You are energized by the steady and deliberate journey from ignorance to competence. The thrill of the first few facts, the early efforts to recite or practice what you have learned, the growing confidence of a skill mastered-this is the process that entices you. Your excitement leads you to engage in adult learning experiences-yoga or piano lessons or graduate classes. It enables you to thrive in dynamic work environments where you are asked to take on short project assignments and are expected to learn a lot about the new subject matter in a short period of time and then move on to the next one. This Learner theme does not necessarily mean that you seek to become the subject matter expert, or that you are striving for the respect that accompanies a professional or academic credential. The outcome of the learning is less significant than the "getting there."

I love to learn! This is definitely me. I'm one of those weird kids who loves school for the work and the studying. I love that you learn something new everyday no matter your age it just happens that way. I have a journal called "something new" and I write down the things I learn everyday. I like to go back and see how much knowledge I've accumulated over the years and how I use that information today or how it has benefited me. I read the Dictionary for fun, what kind of person does that and doesn't like to learn?

Achiever

Your Achiever theme helps explain your drive. Achiever describes a constant need for achievement. You feel as if every day starts at zero. By the end of the day you must achieve something tangible in order to feel good about yourself. And by "every day" you mean every single day-workdays, weekends, vacations. No matter how much you may feel you deserve a day of rest, if the day passes without some form of achievement, no matter how small, you will feel dissatisfied. You have an internal fire burning inside you. It pushes you to do more, to achieve more. After each accomplishment is reached, the fire dwindles for a moment, but very soon it rekindles itself, forcing you toward the next accomplishment. Your relentless need for achievement might not be logical. It might not even be focused. But it will always be with you. As an Achiever you must learn to live with this whisper of discontent. It does have its benefits. It brings you the energy you need to work long hours without burning out. It is the jolt you can always count on to get you started on new tasks, new challenges. It is the power supply that causes you to set the pace and define the levels of productivity for your work group. It is the theme that keeps you moving.

I do like the feeling of accomplishment and I do like to have done something everyday. I like to feel like I've done something worthwhile with my life and day and live life to the fullest in that sense but I'm not sure if I'm over the top in this area. I am an overachiever when it comes to school and such but maybe this does describe me. I'm not sure how accurate it is.



I think overall these things really described me. They all seem to be right on target which is very cool. I'm interested to see what my friends and family what to say about the accuracy of these strengths.

Who Am I?

My name is Christina Spencer and I'm a freshman here at APU. I'm 17 years old and I'm an only child. I have two step-brothers named Ryan and Chris ages 17 and 15. I'm the oldest of the three of us. I live with my mom and step-dad Ray in Simi Valley, California. I have one dog and her name is Yoda. I love to sing and play the piano. My favorite pass time besides those two things is reading. I read the most books ever in our school at my high school. I even read the Dictionary for fun. My favorite subject is English beside music. I've been singing my whole life, in choir since 1st grade, and private lessons for 3 years. I've been playing piano for 10 years. I'm very close to my family especially my mom. I lost my dad to cancer when I was seven so she has been my hero and my life support my entire life. She's my best friend. My favorite football team is the Dallas Cowboys my whole Spencer side are big football fans, it's a family thing. I love country music the best but I love all kinds of things from hip hop to classical. My dream is to become a famous country singer. I like to take pictures as a hobby and ballroom dancing with my partner Jon. I've been ballroom dancing for almost 3 years and we take from a Romanian trainer as well as do competitions. I love it. That about sums me up.