Friday, June 3, 2011

Crossroads

I know God has something planned for my life, but I'm just so unsure what that plan is. I am truly enjoying the time I have to spend with my friends and my family. This is a break that I have never had and I am trying to make the most of this time, but I can't help but feel discouraged that I have come to a complete stand still along this road of life. I am trying my best to patient and know that He is in control, but I can't see in either direction and I feel completely helpless. It is so difficult to remain content with my situation. I am really having a hard time no having a job. I keep thinking about how I have loans that will be need to be paid off soon and how am I going to get the money to do that. I am also vehicle-less and I can't seem to get a job without a car. My mom and I are looking, but we don't have enough for a nice car and we can't find one for the price we want to pay. I really want to get my singing going, but I feel I have no direction. I have always been a planner and to not have a plan, or a plan that no longer applies, is severely disheartening for me. I want to make a demo, but I don't have enough original songs. I have one original. I am not good at writing the music part; lyrics are my forte. Also, I don't know how to go about getting background music for them. I could go to a studio and have them do it, but that cost money, which only brings me back to my first dilemma. I need to trust. I need faith. I need to stop being in control. Why are those things difficult? I feel as though I am stuck in the middle of contentment and frustration. Weird....

1 comment:

Adam & Jasmine Zickefoose said...

Just hang in there girl, God is in control. He knows what He is doing, you just have to wait around to find out. Live your life in the mean-time and He will reveal it to you. That's His promise to us. Just be patient and it will all come together according to His will for your life. Trust!! It's hard not to be in control, but He never said it was going to be easy-that's the devil's lie! Hang in there girlie!! (Imagine my dilemma ;)